Thursday 3 October, 2013: One Hundred and Eighty Three.

Since having Ayla I’ve learned how to let things go and chill out a bit.

I’m a planner. I always have been and always will be, but Ayla’s taught me that its ok if plans don’t go to plan.

Instead, I’ve learned to focus on what really matters (and let me tell you it’s never the cleanliness of my floors) and I’m slowly learning to give myself a break.

For the first time in a long time (or maybe even ever) I don’t feel pressure to perform for others, or to uphold a certain image. And I’m even learning to ignore some of the “what ifs” that used to plague my every decision.

It’s been a huge step for me, and one I haven’t fully mastered yet, but I certainly feel more calm, confident and happy than I ever have before.

And it’s all thanks to Baby Ayla who’s been a role model of love, resilience, authenticity and vulnerability.