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Flat

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Thursday, 22 May 2014: One Year and Fifty Two Days Old.

Today marked the second time in a week someone has commented on my flat chest.

Sure, I’d sort of realised that since going back to work my boobs had shrunk a bit, but I didn’t realise it was so noticeable’

Admittedly I’ve had to pack a whole bunch of bras away until such a time as I become pregnant again, but it turns out my decreasing milk supply is also resulting in ill-fitting frocks!

I’m not quite sure how I feel about it to be honest.

I’ve always been proud of my figure, attributing my boobs to being one of my best physical features, so now that they’re almost gone (like, actually gone) I’m definitely disappointed.

I also feel torn between sadness and pride; sad that my boobs are disappearing into oblivion before my eyes, but proud that I’ve been able to use them to sustain a human life, Ayla’s life, for nearly fourteen months.

I’m sad about the change in my figure, but I’m also proud for having lost my baby weight in a healthy, natural way.

And, I’m sad about the loss of my “youth”… The days of squeezing into too tight tops just to see how many second glances I’d get are LONG gone, but I’m proud to have swapped that for a gorgeous baby girl and her adoring father, and proud that I’m proud of that!

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No steps

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Monday, 19 May 2014: One Year and Seven Weeks Old.

I found out today that Ayla has been walking around heaps at day care!

Although I’d know Ayla had taken a few steps last week, when I picked her up today the day care mums greeted me with excited claims that Ayla was now properly walking.

Of course I couldn’t wait to get home and see Ayla out her new skills in action but alas, at home Ayla seems perfectly content on all fours.

Throughout the afternoon and evening Ayla keep standing and clapping, but still no steps.

Then when we went out for a swim before dinner Ayla walked the whole length of the patio holding on to her Daddy’s hand with the biggest smile on her face.

My heart melted and a took a moment to record the memory in my brain forever; a tiny little blonde haired, chubby legged Baby Ayla, holding on tight to get Daddy’s weathered hand, both of them oozing pride and happiness like I’ve never seen before.

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Where’s your nose?

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Wednesday, 12 April 2014: Three Hundred and Forty Five Days Old.

Ayla learned where her nose is today!

I’ve been trying to teach her for a week or so now but usually she just copies me and points to my nose or pretends she’s pointing at something else.

I think it’s been a little tricky for Ayla to learn because she’s always understood “where is” in terms of things external to her, like The Dog, Cat Cat or Daddy.

But today she finally realised that there’s things different things that make up “Ayla” and she’s learned that her nose is one of them.

It just makes me well with pride when Ayla learns new things like this. I am so proud of her intelligence, her confidence, her ability to adapt, learn and grow.

And what a cute little nose it is! Who wouldn’t want to know where it is?!

I can’t wait to pretend I’ve pulled it offer her face though, in that game where you pretend the tip of your thumb is someone’s nose!

I think Ayla will love it but I’ll give it a couple of weeks before I try it I think… don’t want her to think her nose has gone just days after she found it!

PS – if you think Ayla’s adorable please vote for her in the Bonds Babies Search, Australia’s biggest baby photo comp!

C’mon, who wouldn’t wanna see that face on a billboard! Click here to vote

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Gift of life

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Thursday, 12 September 2013: One Hundred and Sixty Four Days Old.

Hubby and I were chatting tonight when he pointed out that we’ve given the gift of life to somebody, we’ve created a whole person.

Although in tough times we might feel we’ve given a bit of our lives, what we’ve given Ayla is the most ultimate gift of all.

And our reward is sharing her new life with her.

Like the first time she tries sherbet.

Like when she feels proud for the first time.

Like learning why the sky is blue.

Like finding her first shell on the beach.

All the beautiful, wonderful and amazing things that we’ve done during our lives we get to experience again, through the eyes of our little girl.